Column: Actions can make a big difference
Bryan Rolfsen / Columnist
Issue date: 3/23/09 Section: Opinions
This past summer, my cousin died from a drug overdose.
They found crystal meth, cocaine, pot and alcohol in his system. He was only 23 years old.
This was a major blow to my family. I had not been very close to him, but some of the people around me were.
To be honest, I had absolutely no idea how to deal with a death like that, much less console the people who were more grief-stricken than me.
But last Saturday, while at home up north, I learned a neat life lesson.
My aunt, his mother, who I haven't talked to in about six years, recently contacted me on Facebook.
We exchanged a few wall posts and links. Eventually, I asked her if she would like to get some lunch while I was at home.
She agreed, and I didn't really think too much more about it.
When the day of our lunch came, I found myself rather nervous. Sometimes it can be very difficult to pick up where you left off with someone from the past.
But my fears were quickly assuaged. We talked about all sorts of things. We went on diatribes about our broken, screwed-up families. I waxed poetic about my school endeavors.
I met her youngest son for the first time since he was a baby.
Then we went back to her house where we took turns playing songs on the guitar to one another.
Sharing our musical common ground brought our spirits closer together (if this seems strange to you, consult a musician).
And so it was, I made my farewells and hit the road.
Then, later that day, I got a call from my mother.
She told me that my aunt called and told her that our visit had really brightened her life.
I didn't know it, but apparently due to her grief, she hadn't been out of the house on any sort of social engagement in months.
She said it made her feel a sort of happiness that hadn't been there for quite some time.
I'm not meaning to beat my own drum, but this goes to show that small gestures really do go a long way.
I never called her after her son's death; I had no idea what to say. I never wrote; I just passed my condolences through the grapevine.
But this interaction, a laissez-faire lunch, provided her with something I was completely unconscious of giving and probably incapable of properly articulating.
I guess we never really know how far our actions can travel.
Bryan Rolfsen is a senior biology major. He can be reached at 581-7942 or at DENopinions@gmail.com.
They found crystal meth, cocaine, pot and alcohol in his system. He was only 23 years old.
This was a major blow to my family. I had not been very close to him, but some of the people around me were.
To be honest, I had absolutely no idea how to deal with a death like that, much less console the people who were more grief-stricken than me.
But last Saturday, while at home up north, I learned a neat life lesson.
My aunt, his mother, who I haven't talked to in about six years, recently contacted me on Facebook.
We exchanged a few wall posts and links. Eventually, I asked her if she would like to get some lunch while I was at home.
She agreed, and I didn't really think too much more about it.
When the day of our lunch came, I found myself rather nervous. Sometimes it can be very difficult to pick up where you left off with someone from the past.
But my fears were quickly assuaged. We talked about all sorts of things. We went on diatribes about our broken, screwed-up families. I waxed poetic about my school endeavors.
I met her youngest son for the first time since he was a baby.
Then we went back to her house where we took turns playing songs on the guitar to one another.
Sharing our musical common ground brought our spirits closer together (if this seems strange to you, consult a musician).
And so it was, I made my farewells and hit the road.
Then, later that day, I got a call from my mother.
She told me that my aunt called and told her that our visit had really brightened her life.
I didn't know it, but apparently due to her grief, she hadn't been out of the house on any sort of social engagement in months.
She said it made her feel a sort of happiness that hadn't been there for quite some time.
I'm not meaning to beat my own drum, but this goes to show that small gestures really do go a long way.
I never called her after her son's death; I had no idea what to say. I never wrote; I just passed my condolences through the grapevine.
But this interaction, a laissez-faire lunch, provided her with something I was completely unconscious of giving and probably incapable of properly articulating.
I guess we never really know how far our actions can travel.
Bryan Rolfsen is a senior biology major. He can be reached at 581-7942 or at DENopinions@gmail.com.
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